Collegiate Examinations and Worship

I had quite a knack for taking tests back in my college days at UCLA. I certainly was never the smartest guy in class, and I usually found the first few lectures of the academic quarter to be quite intimidating. The professors would expound on concepts that were so foreign to me, that when my classmates raised their hands to ask questions, not only would I not understand the answers, I could not even understand the questions. Over the course of the weeks, these same classmates would form study groups and discuss minutiae, meet with the professors in their offices during scheduled office hours, and spend endless hours quizzing each other before examinations. They would also make audio recordings of the lectures and purchase lecture notes written by former students who clearly knew the subjects. Meanwhile, I mostly studied alone, as I was by nature a fairly shy and solitary creature. I rarely purchased lecture notes, and my few tape recordings of lectures were of poor quality. My preparation for examinations consisted mainly of listening to the lectures, reading parts of textbooks, and reviewing the largely illegible scribbles in my class notes. On the day of examination, as my classmates desperately huddled with their books and notes to gain any last-minute advantage, I realized that there wasn't much more that I could do to prepare for the test, so I would simply close my eyes, hum the Rocky theme music in my head, and hope for the best.

More often than not, I would ace the test, and outperform virtually every one of my classmates whom I initially found to be intimidatingly smart. It wasn't because I studied harder – it was because I studied smarter. Instead of trying to remember every detail of the course material, I was often able to discern from the lectures whether the professor considered certain concepts or facts to be important. By listening for signs of emphasis, repetition and the amount of time devoted to certain parts of the syllabus, I was able to identify those that were likely to be in the tests, and spent my time more efficiently by concentrating my studying efforts on the essential material.

In the same way, it is possible to discern from God's word what He deems of vital importance, and in the record of His dealings with the Israelites in the desert, worship clearly took top billing. When God called Moses into Mount Sinai for forty days and forty nights, Moses received detailed instructions on how God was to be worshiped, from the details and designs of the tabernacle, the utensils for making offerings, and proper protocol for offering sacrifices, even to specifications of the high priest's underwear (Exodus 25-31). God did not instruct Moses on the Ten Commandments or how to govern the people while he was cloaked by smoke in the mountain. God spoke about worship, and worship alone.

When we worship God, we acknowledge and declare His words through the prophet Isaiah,

“I am the LORD, and there is no other,

apart from me there is no God.” (Isaiah 45:5a)

The subject of worship is emphasized in the Bible, repeated throughout the Bible, and occupies many chapters and verses in the Bible. May we be discerning in our studies and realize its primacy in our life's journeys.

Smackdown in the Operating Room

"Hey Jake, your procedure's finished. Open your eyes!"

Jake is a teen boy who underwent an endoscopy under anesthesia. The nurse anesthetist just removed his breathing tube as the anesthesia started to wear off, and he likely would soon open his eyes and follow commands. I was busy typing the procedure report on the computer, but staying close to the patient in case assistance was needed. My work was abruptly interrupted by sounds of banging and smashing against the operating table as a very confused and delirious Jake struggled to get up, and as the staff in the operating room tried to keep him down, Jake violently pushed and kicked the flurry of hands, arms and bodies around him, angrily screamed expletives, and appeared to be gaining the upper hand in the situation until all available doctors, nurses, technicians and orderlies jumped in to help secure the patient. I was also among the number, trying to immobilize his lower extremities by wrapping my arms and body against his knees. By the time we were able to securely transfer Jake to a gurney and have him physically restrained until he fully regained consciousness, I had realized that while my arms did a reasonable job controlling his legs, my 135-pound body was little match against his strength, as he literally picked me off the floor whenever he flexed his knees, dragging me like a bullrider hanging on for dear life.

Jake's delrious frenzy was an extreme example of patients whose minds pass through various stages of consciousness as they emerge from general anesthesia. While there was indeed plenty of drama in the operating room that evening, none of the operating room staff was particularly alarmed, as we all knew that it would be only a matter of minutes before he would calm down, and that he likely would not even have much memory of the incident afterwards. Jake's mental state resembled someone who is under the influence of alcohol, which robs a person of "higher" mental functions such as judgment, reason and restraint, and causes one to behave as one who seems possessed by the devil.

Just as Jake was held captive by the lingering effects of anesthetics, humans by nature are under the bondage of sin and evil, and are powerless against its destructive hold on our lives. Jesus was met by a man with an evil spirit:

This man lived in the tombs, and no one could bind him any more, not even with a chain. For he had often been chained hand and foot, but he tore the chains apart and broke the irons on his feet. No one was strong enough to subdue him. Night and day among the tombs and in the hills he would cry out and cut himself with stones. (Mark 5:3-5)

The apostle Paul wrote about our struggles with our sinful nature:

I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do. And if I do what I do not want to do I agree that the law is good. As it is, it is no longer I myself who do it, but it is sin living in me. (Romans 7:15-17)

On the other hand, when we yield the control of our lives to the Holy Spirit, we paradoxically gain freedom and control:

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. (Galatians 5:22-23)

May we remain sober and live fully as we surrender our lives to God.

Medical Malpractice

"So, Doctor, you were well-trained and well-qualified to provide the care, you knew about potential complications with this procedure, and you knew what ought to be done to rule out such complications...why did you not do it?"

"I...had a lapse in judgment."

Those six fateful words still ring in my head years after the deposition I had to give in response to a lawsuit against me. A child with complex medical problems died a day after I performed a procedure on him in the emergency room. One of the hardest things to do is to admit that I made a mistake. What made the admission even more painful was the recognition that the error would soon become a part of my public record, and that several of my colleagues and mentors had already known the details of the case. While a couple of medical experts provided opinions in my defense, others harshly criticized my actions and declared me as being negligent and clearly responsible for the child's death. A couple of these medical experts knew me personally, and I was sure that gossips and rumors about my failings would soon spread throughout the medical community. I would have to declare details of the lawsuit whenever I renewed my medical staff privileges for several years. I no longer had an impeccable reputation, and had joined the ranks of doctors who were ravaged by the agony of medical malpractice judgments. I felt exposed, naked and ashamed, and my confidence as a physician was shattered...

...temporarily.

Over the years, I have continued to perform the same procedure more than a hundred times, and have become the recognized expert in it among several of my peers. The unfortunate mistake early in my professional career made me a better doctor, and the experience enabled me to subsequently safely navigate through many challenging procedures. I no longer need to protect an unblemished record, and am only concerned with trying to be the best doctor possible. I am thankful that God does not abandon people who make mistakes.

As painful as my medical-legal encounter was, it was nothing compared to what the apostle Peter went through. While he was a leader among Jesus' disciples, he also committed the atrocious act of openly denying Jesus prior to the crucifixion. Imagine the shame and guilt he must have felt, especially in the presence of the other disciples and before the risen Christ! Yet, Jesus reinstated Peter at the shore of Galilee (John 21), and he spent his remaining years being a pillar of the church. Surely Peter remembered throughout the years the very words he uttered in denying Jesus. However, those words of denial were overshadowed by Jesus' commands,

"Feed my lambs."

"Take care of my sheep."

"Feed my sheep."

As the deposition ended, the plaintiff's attorney collected her files, looked at me intently, and said something that I didn't expect:

"You're going to be a great doctor."

Her voice choked a bit, and I saw a shimmering reflection of what appeared to be tears in her eyes.

I knew that things were going to be different from that point on.

Something's Missing

Bucketfuls of water from a flash thunderstorm poured on my compact rental car as I scanned the streets around the motel for a quick dinner.  I was attending a conference in New Orleans, and had a hankering for some old fashioned Southern cooking.  I passed by several fast food joints, including a McDonalds, a Pizza Hut and a Sonic, before I noticed a Popeye's in the corner.  Ah, yes.  Popeye's fried chicken.  I've eaten at Popeye's in Los Angeles before, but having spicy fried chicken at the cradle of Southern and Cajun cuisine, that sounded pretty good.  I pulled into the parking lot, made a mad dash into the restaurant just as a large rain cell descended, and waited in line, appearing quite conspicuously in the crowd not only because I was soaking wet, but also because I was the only Asian in the restaurant.  No matter.  I came to get my fried chicken, so I was going to get my fried chicken.  I checked the menu board and approached to place my order.

"Uh, I'd like the two-piece combo with the cole slaw, red beans and rice, and..."

"Sorry, we're out of fried chicken."

What?  No fried chicken at a fried chicken place?  I could understand if a pizza place ran out of wings or a public restroom ran out of toilet paper, but this was really disappointing.  Fortunately, they did not completely run out of chicken, and I settled for the spicy chicken strips and extra packets of barbeque sauce to go with them.  They were satisfying, but they weren't what I wanted.

Just as I visited a fried chicken restaurant expecting to have fried chicken, we attend church on Sundays expecting certain "signature" flavors and dishes.  It's nice if the church has handsome, well-groomed greeters and ushers, clean seats, comfortable air conditioning, excellent music, good preaching and friendly conversation, but those are just "fixins" on the side, like an order of curly fries, biscuits or cole slaw.  They're nothing special - I could find similar ambiance (and sometimes more) at a time-share sales presentation.  On the other hand, we leave church in awe, and our lives begin to be transformed, when we seek and experience God's presence and holiness, and when our brokenness is mended by unconditional, sacrificial and genuine love.  God is not pleased when we do not genuinely seek Him, and do not infuse all our actions with love:

"The Lord says: 'These people come near to me with their mouth and honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me.  Their worship of me is based on merely human rules they have been taught." (Isaiah 29:13)

"If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal.  If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing.  If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing." (1 Corinthians 13:1-3)

May we never fail to have our signature recipe in abundance.

Sight Reading

“So, Dad...how's life?”

My daughter seemed a bit bored as we were taking a walk to the local Starbucks Coffee shop, and asked the question simply to get me to talk. She knew that it would work every time.

“Well, life is like a big performance on stage...without a dress rehearsal. You only get to do it once, so it's important to make the best of every moment that we have. Actually, life is more like sight-reading....”

I thought that the analogy of sight-reading instrumental music would be easily understandable for her, as she took several years of piano lessons, and now plays flute in her middle school band and in a local youth wind ensemble. Sight-reading instrumental music means that one plays a piece of music for the first time (often not having any preconceived idea of how it is supposed to sound like) while simultaneously reading the notes on the music score. Most novice musicians initially find sight-reading difficult, as it requires one to read several beats of music ahead of the notes being played, in order that the proper sequence of notes, choices of various alternate fingerings, dynamics (loudness), and any additional techniques can be planned and performed flawlessly. A skilled musician can actually hear the upcoming measures of the music before they are being played. It requires both attention to the present and preparation for the moments ahead.

Just as it is necessary to “read ahead” when sight-reading music, it is also important to consider the paths before us when we journey through life. One does not try to board a plane without first purchasing a ticket, and ought not try to buy a car without knowing how to pay for it. Certain careers require years of preparation to obtain the necessary qualifications simply to enter training. Although Jesus taught that we ought not worry about the future, as all things are in God's hand, he did not forbid us from planning ahead and making preparations. Worrying is not the same thing as planning ahead and being prepared. In fact, the familiar “woman of noble character” that is described in Proverbs 31 indicated that she...

...gets up while it is still night;

... provides food for her family and portions for her female servants. (v. 15)

...considers a field and buys it; out of her earnings she plants a vineyard. (v. 16)

...sees that her trading is profitable, and her lamp does not go out at night. (v.18)

...has no fear for her household (when it snows); for all of them are clothed in scarlet. (v. 21)

...is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come. (v. 25)

...watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. (v.27)

May we not fail to scan the notes, beats and measures ahead as we travel in our life's journeys. May we hear the music in advance, and prudently plan our paths according to what God reveals to us through His word.

The wisdom of the prudent is to give thought to their ways,

but the folly of fools is deception.

(Proverbs 14:8)

Finish Up Strong!

I stood toward the back of the second corral at the start of the 2010 Long Beach International City Marathon, among those with predicted marathon finish times of about 3 hours and 40 minutes. This was my 21^st marathon in 8 years, and possibly my last for a while, as I decided instead to give the triathlon a try the following year. My training cycle for this race was pretty meager compared to preparations for previous races, and I dreaded the thought of running out of gas and hitting the wall during the second half of the race. After all, I had never quite mastered the art of proper pacing during my first 20 races, and invariably would start too fast and bonk with several miles remaining. Although my most recent race times were in the 3:20s to 3:30s range, I decided to line myself further back for once, to see if a deliberately slower start would lead me toward a stronger finish.

As the race unfolded, I tried initially to more or less to keep pace with the runners around me, rather than my usual habit of weaving and passing others. As the crowd thinned out a bit, I looked for young ladies with good running form to guide my effort and speed, as I learned that female runners tend to be better at pacing than males over long distances (they were also nice to look at, but that was a fringe benefit). I crossed the half-way point nearly 15 minutes slower than my fastest earlier efforts, and started to wonder whether I made a serious strategic error. If I was going to hit the wall at mile 20, I might not be able to finish the race in 4 hours.

Thankfully, the dreaded bonk never happened. The conservative effort during the first half paid off handsomely, as I was able to maintain my pace almost throughout the race, and got to experience the thrill of picking off fatiguing runners one by one during the last 10 miles. I crossed the finish line about a minute in front of the 3:40 pace team, and though my time was quite slow compared to those earlier in the year, I was able to achieve a “negative split” for the first time. It turned out that I ran the second half of the 26.2 mile race one minute faster than the first half, while a 10 – 20 minutes of positive split was the rule for me in earlier events, even on the same course. I was able to finish up strong.

As I am now well into the second half of my earthly existence, I am concerned not only with finishing up strong during races, but in life as well. Unfortunately, the world is full of individuals who were brilliant in their pursuits and full of promise during their younger years, but ended their lives disastrously as they succumbed to the consequences of sin, pride and/or indiscretion. The sports world is replete with examples of athletes with multi-million contracts who became destitute within a few years of retirement, and many who lived less glamorous lives lamented in their waning moments dreams that were shattered by drugs, alcoholism, unhealthy lifestyles, hatred, unforgiveness or infidelity. Thankfully, the year 2010 was also notable for two godly men, Mr. Art Linkletter (best known for hosting the television program, “Kids Say the Darndest Things”, and Coach John Wooden, former basketball coach at UCLA, who completed their lives victoriously during the tenth decade of their lives. These men remained faithful to the Lord and continued to be sources of inspiration and positive influence to generations of people through their wisdom and service until they breathed their last, and will forever be remembered among those few who finished well.

The Bible also is full of examples of individuals who failed to finish well. Saul was the son of “a man of standing”, was “an impressive young man without equal among the Israelites”, and was chosen to be the first king of Israel. Yet, his life ended miserably, as pride, jealousy and disobedience caused him to unravel, and God eventually rejected him as king. King David, his successor, was a man after God's own heart, but his legacy was forever tarnished by adultery and murder. The list of poor finishers in the Bible also includes Solomon, Asa, Hezekiah...a virtual biblical hall of fame. Nevertheless, strong finishers do exist in the Bible, and among them include Enoch, Joshua, Caleb, Daniel, many of the early Christian apostles, and Jesus, our Lord and Savior.

May we fix our eyes on the road ahead and finish up strong.

“I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. Now there is in store for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will award to me on that day – and not only to me, but also to all who have longed for his appearing.” 2 Timothy 4:7-8